Author Archives: Frankly Speaking

Greg

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Every Saturday, I work 7AM to 7PM as an EMT doing inter-facility transports. These Saturdays have taught me something: the moment people stop walking, they start dying.

Because once most people stop walking, they give up taking care of themselves. And in modern American society, once someone who doesn’t have money stops taking care of themselves, they get sent somewhere like “Garden Grove Skilled Nursing” where they are kept alive, but just barely, by techs making ten cents above minimum wage and nurses assigned three times the legally mandated maximum number of patients. 

And living at Garden Grove* is a life worse than death. You lie in your bed and watch your TV and eat your gruel and digest it and then soil yourself and lie in your filth and call out for help but none comes until two hours later when a manager yells to “fix that smell” and they find you and clean you up. And you watch your mind unravel and degenerate and slowly come apart because nobody with a normal, functioning brain could ever last at Garden Grove. And then, after a few weeks or months or years or decades of life without living, you eventually die. 

Unless you’re Greg*. Greg is a white man in his early 40s with tattoos on both shoulder caps wearing a sleeveless tee and lying on a gurney in the emergency room hallway near the corner they usually put the drunks. He’s got a barrel chest, thick arms, and skinny, atrophied legs—he was paralyzed from the waist down in an accident that broke his neck about five years ago. That was the second time he’s broken his neck, and this time, the doctors and physical therapists couldn’t fix it. Greg’s about 250 pounds and was probably a little under six feet tall when he could still stand. In other words: he’s built like a tank. 

Greg came to the hospital because he was moving himself to his manual wheelchair since his powered one was broken and felt a sudden recoil and a sharp pain in his shoulder. He tried to push through the pain for a few days, and then went to physical therapy and got told that they would not do any normal PT because he obviously needed to go to the damn hospital. And so now here he is, and they scanned his shoulder and told him that he did indeed injure it, and now he’s going to need to make an appointment with orthopedics so that they can get him started on getting all fixed up. He’s pissed off about it—now his shoulder is fucked and he’s going to have to go through months of rehab before he gets it back to full function, and he needs his shoulders working so that he can be properly independent because Greg doesn’t live at a place like Garden Grove—Greg lives at home. 

Actually, that statement is far too passive. Greg fights to live at home. Aggressively. Voraciously. Constantly. He keeps up the strength to move his 250 pounds of bulk from the wheelchair to the commode and back. He refuses to allow anyone else to clean him. He showers himself and cooks for himself and feeds himself and goes to the bathroom without assistance. He asserts his own dignity and independence in a situation where such an assertion is a radical act. 

The system is not built to support someone like Greg; it is built to funnel people into Garden Grove because Garden Grove is a much simpler, neater way of “handling” the Gregs of the world. But Greg has pushed back against the pressures of this system. He’s pushed for referrals, resources, tools, and people who can help him to live his life with dignity. He has to fight tooth and nail for these things! People don’t want to help him do this because figuring out how to help this man maintain his dignity and independence while still living in his own home is a lot harder and more legally risky than just shipping him off to Garden Grove like they do with all the others. Because as Greg told me, if you’re paralyzed “they treat you like you’re intellectually disabled”—like you are someone who is not capable of adding a relevant, meaningful voice to the conversation. 

But Greg keeps fighting. He demands to be taught how to give himself the enema he needs to have a bowel movement. He wears down his insurance until they give him the powered wheelchair which enables him to reach high shelves. He goes to physical therapy most days of the week and keeps up his strength because he will be independent and he will maintain his dignity and nobody is going to make that happen but him. 

I learned all of this about Greg in the back of the ambulance, taking him home from the hospital. As we worked our way back to his apartment, he was brainstorming how he’d handle the new challenge of only having one usable shoulder—he was pretty pissed about it all, but he was thinking out how it could work. He talked through how physical therapy would be different now with one working arm, and complained that it would probably take him weeks to find an opening for an appointment about his shoulder. He also mentioned his job search—he’s trying to find a 9-to-5 where he can work remotely, and he was recently talking with one of his doctors about becoming a patient advocate; the work appealed to him. 

Maybe if Greg’s powered wheelchair wasn’t broken, or if it had gotten fixed faster, he wouldn’t have overtired his shoulders and gotten injured. Maybe if the healthcare system was designed to support people in living independently instead of consigning them to a life of dependence, he wouldn’t have to fight as much as he does for every inch. Lots of maybes, but Greg doesn’t seem to dwell in them—he just does whatever needs to be done. 

On my Saturday night drives home from my EMT job, I typically call my mom; that night, I told her about Greg. She was as impressed as I was—the sentiment was colored by the fact that my younger sister has Down Syndrome, and so my parents have been fighting for the last eighteen years so that my sister can have that same self-determination that Greg is striving for. 

After hearing about Greg and his battles, my mom asked me something which stuck with me. She asked me if I’d asked Greg what tools he was missing—tools he thought could be useful for him in the future to continue maintaining his independence. And I realized that I never did. 

I am twenty-one years old, and I don’t know what my career will look like in the future. All I know is that I want to give people the tools to help themselves—to give themselves agency, dignity, and independence. I don’t want to “fix” them—people are not problems to be solved. I want to work with the people who will never be all-the-way “normal,” and I want to help them take and keep control of their lives. 

I want to design for Greg. 

*pseudonyms

My Only Important Reflection On Olin

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Over my time at Olin, I have loved the honest, community-focused criticisms, praises, ideas, jokes, and everything else that Frankly Speaking has contained. I also enjoy writing and reflecting, and through my four years, I have made it a practice to use the Frankly format to write out my reflections specifically pertinent to Olin. My Google Drive is littered with documents named “Potential Frankly:…” followed by titles of almost a dozen half-finished thoughts. Some I wrote in one-night rages and never revisited, others were thoroughly edited and peer-reviewed only to not be submitted at the last moment. 

I knew I wanted to write one more Frankly Speaking, but I didn’t know what would be actually valuable to focus upon in this “last shot.” I considered revisiting my reflections on creating change at Olin, maybe one about our approach to community building and buy-in. Finally, I thought I was honing into writing about the many reflections I have on the tensions created by Olin’s apoliticalness. 

But in looking through all of my reflections, it became clear that only one was actually important: where the best spots on campus are to birdwatch.

Okay, so it obviously depends what you’re trying to see and when you’re trying to see it, but just gonna go over a generalist tour:

  • Right out the gates, I’m going to lead with a hot take: the maintenance area right inside Parcel B by the soccer fields. You wouldn’t think it, but honestly, great-ass spot to see birds. Not only do you got the open area, a mix of coniferous and deciduous and dead and live trees, BUT you also are sat up on a bit of a hill so you get a better view of the whole tree.
  • Going off this idea, a good climbing tree…Get up there and sit a bit! You’ll see so much cool stuff around ya! Best climbing tree in Parcel B is yours to find, but as a hint, if you walk in a straight line from East Hall to the pond, you’ll walk right by it.
  • Shoot, I didn’t mean to put the cart before the horse here, ‘cause I know some of y’all don’t have a pair of binoculars/bird identification stuff. That’s a-okay! You can check out binoculars from the library (common Olin Library W), and Merlin Bird ID is a great free app for bird identification! If you don’t want all the hassle of identification, I respect though.
  • The whole pond area is just the absolute best. Y’all, I have seen Solitary Sandpipers out there cozy-as-can-be once the native wildflowers grow up over the summer. Isn’t that crazy at Olin?? Also, it’s just great seeing the swallows there along with larger water birds like ducks and herons! 
  • For rarer finds, deeper in the woods is always a good bet. There’s a roughly-beaten path back past the prairie and, for a special treat right now, there’s a pair of nesting Pileated Woodpeckers right along the path!
  • Lastly, the marsh area you pass when driving in is just a classic. There are always Red Tailed Hawks hanging around and the Red Winged Blackbirds make for an amazing sunset experience!

Reach out to me if you got any questions, but otherwise, happy birding and happy time at Olin! Make sure to reflect on the important things. And write your own Franklys too—the more we share as a community, the more we understand each other and grow together, and most importantly, the more birds we see.

My total Olin bird count (as of 4/30): 65 unique species. (Absolutely ROOKIE numbers by the way, other past Olin students have cracked 100 on campus before. Could be you!)

The Dying Art of Mental Masturbation

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I am currently mentally masturbating. As I begin to write this piece, it is 10:31AM and I am at Wellesley—I’m planning to go to office hours for my chemistry class, and I got here a half-hour early to have a meeting which ended about ten minutes ago. This week is going to be crazy busy with Passover, a CD design review, biology catch-up, and other silliness—I should be using this time to work! But instead, I am doing none of those things because I saw Maddy’s email about Frankly Speaking submissions being due and decided to write this piece—it’s an indulgence, and a fun one, too.

 I initially heard this concept from my father. In his first year of residency, the attending surgeons kept telling him to “stop mentally masturbating and just start cutting people up.” The concept can be summarized as the practice of doing indulgent, meandering intellectual tasks when more direct action could be taken. 

At Olin, this seemingly meaningless exploration and indulgence often is the real work; mental masturbation is an essential part of the Olin experience. Being a student at Olin means getting sidetracked. It often involves horrendously overscoping your QEA project because you think it would be cool, or staying up until the sun rises to get your Mech Proto automata working. 

Olin’s pedagogy heavily promotes a unique combination of whimsy, grit, and intellectual indulgence, and provides a beautiful example of how this exploration can be used to develop highly effective engineers. At its core, Olin is a college of mental masturbators, and I am proud to be one of them.

However, this culture of intellectual exploration is breaking down into preprofessionalism, and it’s not a pretty sight. Take the rise of 20-crediting. The social pressure to take 20 credits a semester is a new concept—according to professors, even a few years back, an Oliner taking more than 4 classes was a rare exception. Now, it is commonplace.

This is absurd, and entirely against the values of Olin. Instead of spending their time diving deep into concepts, overscoping and gaining the application-based intellectual flexibility which helps Oliners distinguish themselves, many students taking 20 credits end up shoving in content through a firehose without having enough space to truly understand or dive deep, much less actually breathe. 

I learned this lesson from experience—last semester, I was taking 22 credits including PIE, QEA 3, Mech Solids, Organic Chemistry 1, Wellesley poetry, and an ISR. The sheer volume of work prevented me from diving deep into any one particular concept, diluting the value of the courses I was taking. Without unstructured time to recover, breathe, and develop deeper intellectual curiosity in my coursework, I simply did the minimum to achieve a good grade for each class. I cheated myself of the curiosity, learning, and intellectual indulgence which a proper Olin semester should entail. 

Overcommitting yourself gives you the academic equivalent of erectile dysfunction—you become so constantly stressed that you just can’t get it up; you lose all interest in the kind of unstructured learning and growth which is so central to Olin’s curriculum.

As I finish (re)writing this article, it is currently 9:08PM. The official fall course schedule came out a few days ago, and people are beginning to pick out their classes for their fall semesters. 

Inevitably, many rising sophomores will try and take 20 credits, or set themselves up for Mech-E Hell Semester, or plan to do some other ridiculous set of commitments which will make it substantially more difficult to have a good overall learning experience. They’ll get through it—Oliners are aggressively competent, and we know how to check the boxes to achieve outward-facing success. 

So I urge you to consider, if you will, make the time to actually learn—to indulge yourself in self-exploration, curiosity, and joy.

*If you want help planning out your course schedule, please feel free to reach out. It is not an exaggeration to say that I have spent more time planning out my courses than literally any other student at Olin, and I find great joy in helping other people figure out their own path for classes.

Spankley Freaking: This Month’s Rejected Headlines

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Rising Sophomore Lured Into A Suite Double Like Odysseus To The Sirens

“Triplessssssss,” hissed the junior, beckoning them towards East Hall

Carpediem Used For Yet Another Survey

I’m going to seize the day by punching the next P&M student I see in the face

“OK. Now for SURE It’s Spring,” Says First Year In A T-Shirt Right Before Getting Hit In The Face With Another Inch And A Half Of Snow

“Olonion’s Half-Assed Name A Shameless, Blatant Attempt To Ride Off The Coattails Of A Respectable, Established Organization”

Writes Spankly Freaking Editor

“Ahhh, What A Nice Break” Says Student Who Did Not Relax At All Over Break

They are now buried in work. Student is me.

Tour Guide Happens To Have 15th Birthday This Month On The Day Of Their Tour

Root Source of Mistrust Within Olin Community Finally Identified

It was those damn IT phishing emails all along

Lost, Confused Student Doesn’t Know What To Go-To Complain About With Dining Hall Being Undeniably Cracked

“What will I have to talk about??” cries Junior as they dip their freshly grilled flank steak into a fine chimichurri sauce

Spankly March ’26

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Brave people of Olin, we know you have gone with a drought of truth… That, in such a famine as this, you have been unduly forced to bear the wicked cup of lies to your lips and drink the plebeian humours of “Frankly Speaking,” believing the fictitious and malevolent have won.

“Nay!” we say! Though our voices here at Spankly Freaking have yet once more been silenced these past months (we’ve been too lazy to get something together), we brave through this desert to once again provide the oasis of cool water that will soothe your throat, and quench your thirst for truth and justice. 

Without further ado, here are this month’s rejected headlines…

Half-Finished Great Lawn Igloo Serves As Comforting Reminder To Students That They, Too, Will Never Fully Achieve Their Life Goals

“February is depressing enough, but walking back to the dorms each day and getting to see a clear monument to the plight of those who dream too big really just pounds it in,” said senior shortly before looking out of a dark window, sighing

Miller Academic Center Proposes New Strategic Vision: “Olin As A Slowly Decaying Lab”

Exposé Brilliantly, Fearlessly Exposes Urgent Olin Need: Writing Tutors

“Initially, I was hesitant, but when I saw the unattributed quote immediately backed up with a foggy to unclear call to action, I was knocked off my seat. I thought ‘Wow, now this is well-focused, succinct piece of evidence on why Oliners should have someone who isn’t an engineer proofread’”

Par- I Mean Social Gatherings Are Back!

Students prepare to raucously cram 7 people (Fire Safe Occupancy Limit™) into a room for a whole night of unbridled raving that goes until the 12am quiet hours

Olin Drops To #3 In Best Engineering College For Undergraduates 

Pivoting from impact centered education, Olin focuses on military grade, long-range airstrike engineering to finally beat Rose-Hulman “The Hard Way”

Rare Sighting Of A Junior On Campus Made Feb 12th, 4:34PM

“I thought they had all abandoned us!” cried a First-Year before snapping a blurry photo of the lone Junior not on study abroad wistfully roaming through EH 1NN

All Of These Ten Couches Sitting Unused In The EH 3 And 4 Lounge Are Really Just Asking For Someone To Take Them

I mean, who even leaves eight couches just around when no one is using them? It’s not like the lounge will ever need all the five couches that are left in the space. 

R. May Lee Sits All Olin Family Around The Dinner Table To Assure Them That She Is “Not Mad, Just Disappointed”

Report Finds That That One Person On Your CD Team “Coordinating With The People Group” Is, In Fact, Just Playing Clash Royale 

Even worse, they’re playing a Mega Knight deck

My Thoughts on Cheese

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I almost never eat cheese. As a young child, I developed a strong dislike for cheese in all its forms. This seemingly random preference spurred a lifelong effort to avoid cheese and impress onto others the value of reducing cheese consumption. Today, I have a somewhat complex philosophy around cheese. I absolutely refuse to eat so-called “stinky cheeses” under any circumstances; I believe that nobody should eat them when around other people without checking first that the odor will not prove offensive to their table mates. Beyond stinky cheese, I try to avoid other kinds of cheese whenever I can, a stance supported by the gastric distress that can come with eating cheese and other dairy products. This avoidance has two exceptions: I will eat cheese in cases where it would be impolite to refuse, and I will eat cheese in foods where the cheese’s taste and texture is totally dominated by the rest of the food. In this essay, I will explain my philosophy and attempt to persuade readers, both cheese-eaters and cheese-haters, to adopt a similar one.

Cheese stinks. Literally. Stinky cheeses are popular among cheese connoisseurs around the world. My younger sister counts among their ranks; she has a twisted love for Parmesan especially and will pile it on any food she can. An article from Healthline characterizes Parmesan cheese as “an Italian cheese with a characteristically strong and nutty flavor that may be sweet, salty, and bitter at the same time” (Lang). This description leaves out one key characteristic of the cheese—it stinks, especially when it has been heated. Indeed, my sister’s eating it can trigger my gag reflex if I happen to be too close while the fumes waft away from the freshly warmed cheese. This is a result of a well-known quality of Parmesan cheese—it contains butyric acid, which one article describes as “a chemical that contributes to the smell of both Parmesan cheese and vomit” (Jagatia), and which is commonly known to contribute to Parmesan’s distinctive odor. People who deliberately eat Parmesan cheese around other humans without their consent are assaulting their olfactory sensibilities and being generally rude.

I share my disgust around smelly cheese with many like-minded people around the globe. One 2016 study conducted in France found that inhaling the odor of various cheeses was more likely to produce disgust than the odor of other foods. The study discovered that “among the individuals showing disgust for a given food, those disliking cheese represented a higher proportion… than those disliking the other food categories” (Royet et al.). Even in France, a famously cheese-loving country, the odor of cheese is more likely to produce a feeling of disgust than other foods. This aligns with my own experience; while I dislike other foods, nothing provokes the same visceral reaction as cheese. This finding reinforces the fact that cheese’s odor can make it unpleasant and impolite to consume around innocent tablemates of the cheese eater.

An article from the Independent cites William Hanson, an etiquette expert who published a book on the topic, in its description of appropriate workplace snacks. The article combines Hanson’s expertise in etiquette with outside polling to create its own list of office snack etiquette rules. The first rule on this list is to “avoid anything noisy or smelly due to the open-plan nature of most offices today” (Richmond). This etiquette rule can be applied beyond the restrained context of office snacking. It is clearly impolite to force anyone else to endure unpleasant odors without their consent. Stinky cheeses have a strong unpleasant odor. Therefore, people should never eat them without the explicit consent of all those in the area who could be subjected to their odor without an avenue for escape.

At this point, I have established that stinky cheese can be an unpleasant, even rude choice of food when eating with others. Even if you disagree with me on my policy of avoiding cheese, or on any other part of my argument, I hope that we can find agreement on this first point: everyone can agree that it is impolite to subject people to unpleasant odors without their consent, so therefore smelly cheeses should not be eaten around people who have not demonstrated their comfort with such odors. If these other people have indicated that they are comfortable with the odor, the rules of politeness allow for the consumption of stinky cheese. 

Although it may be acceptable to eat stinky cheese in certain circumstances, it is also important to note that cheese eating in general can lead to intestinal distress, making it a poor choice of food for many people who want to avoid copious amounts of gas.

For people who are lactose intolerant, the act of eating cheese or other dairy products can cause significant discomfort. The Mayo Clinic describes how people who are lactose intolerant “have diarrhea, gas and bloating after eating or drinking dairy products” (“Lactose Intolerance”). This is a common experience—lactose intolerance is quite common around the globe. The prevalence of this condition makes it extremely likely that many people are experiencing this gastrointestinal distress without even realizing its cause; abstaining from dairy products such as cheese would likely lead to these gastric effects being reduced or even eliminated. Granted, there are products which can also reduce the effects of dairy consumption for lactose-intolerant people, but many people do not know that they are lactose intolerant, and thus cannot benefit from these products. For this reason, many people who are concerned about gastrointestinal issues may consider avoiding dairy entirely.

While cheese is smelly and can cause gastric distress, it must be acknowledged that there are some cases where one either can or must consume cheese. First is when there is no other alternative. In my personal experience, I have sometimes gone to dinners where cheese is an unavoidable part of the menu. For instance, on a school camping trip, the only food one night was mac ’n’ cheese. That night, I ate the mac ’n’ cheese, even though I strongly dislike cheese, because it was the only option available to me. In another example, I have been served salads with cheese incorporated in. It would have been impolite to pick out the cheese particles from the salad, so I ate the salad without adjustment or complaint. In both cases, I did not make any complaints or try to change the situation, as there was no alternative or way to eliminate the cheese from the food being served, so complaining would have had no positive impact on anyone. 

These personal experiences can be extrapolated into general rules. If one goes to a dinner party or other event in which the host is serving a meal which includes cheese as part of it, and there is no way to avoid the cheese, then it is acceptable to eat some of the cheese. To refuse would be both impolite and impractical—not only is it rude to turn down food, but refusing to eat food with cheese could mean that one eats nothing at all. In these situations, people should eat their food without complaint or apparent discomfort, as any expression of discomfort will have no positive impact and only serve to make both the guests and host uncomfortable. This would not help anyone. The second case in which it is acceptable to eat cheese is in the context of foods in which the cheese’s odor and texture completely is transformed by whatever food it had become part of, to the point that it can scarcely be called “cheese” anymore. Pizza serves as the typical example in my case. One of the most popular foods in America, pizza is delicious and almost universally appreciated, despite its prominent usage of cheese. Most pizzas start off with mozzarella, a milder and generally less offensive cheese. The cheese’s potentially unpleasant texture and flavor are moderated further—even transformed—by the incorporation of pizza sauce and high heat into the process of making a pizza. With these elements, the cheese on a good pizza is almost unrecognizable. This process makes the cheese on pizza palatable for me, and I believe that this same thought process can be used in the context of other foods which use mild cheeses whose original flavors are overpowered by the rest of the dish—lasagna comes to mind. In these contexts, cheese can be an acceptable part of a meal, if it is not consumed in excess and that the (previously discussed) downsides of eating cheese are known to the consumer. With these foods, the intestinal challenges that can come with cheese may be ignored to fully enjoy the depth of flavor of the dish itself.

At this point, my argument ends. As I described at the beginning of my essay, I do not like cheese, and I have developed an intellectual framework around this disliking. Through this

work, I hope that I have persuaded you, both cheese-lovers and cheese-haters, that people should avoid the consumption of smelly cheeses in public settings because of the unpleasant odor. To the people who are unsure on cheese, I hope that I have pushed you a little further towards avoiding cheese with my description of the prevalence of lactose intolerance, and my explanation of how its effects can be decreased by reducing consumption of dairy products. Finally, to my fellow cheese-haters, I hope that I have given you some food for thought on exceptions to our avoidance of cheese. If I have made you think on any of these topics, I consider this essay a success.

Works Cited

Jagatia, Anand. “What’s in a Smell?” BBC Science Focus Magazine, BBC, 12 July 2023,

www.sciencefocus.com/the-human-body/whats-in-a-smell.

“Lactose Intolerance.” Mayo Clinic, Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research,

www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/lactose-intolerance/symptoms-causes/syc-20374232. Accessed 27 June 2025.

Lang, Ariane. “Parmesan Cheese: Nutrition, Benefits, and Uses.” Healthline, Healthline Media, 1

May 2023, www.healthline.com/nutrition/parmesan-cheese-nutrition-benefits-uses.

Richmond, Steve. “Office ‘etiquette’ Guide Advises against Eating Smelly Foods in

Workspaces.” The Independent, 26 Sept. 2023, www.theindependent.com/life-style/food-office-advice-eggs-fish-b2418070.html.

Royet, Jean-Pierre, et al. “The neural bases of disgust for cheese: An fmri study.” Frontiers in

Human Neuroscience, vol. 10, 17 Oct. 2016, https://doi.org/10.3389/fnhum.2016.0051

Are Oliners Okay? 

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Trigger warning: suicidal ideation  

When I came to Olin, I found a community that supported me in ways I had never been able to find before. For the first time, I felt that most of my peers, faculty, and staff saw me as a whole person and genuinely cared about my wellbeing. However, it has become clear to me that here, unlike at other schools I’ve attended, everyone is sick. Many students I’ve talked to have struggled with their mental health and school related issues like I have. Olin’s productivity and overachievement culture often means we often feel pressured to sacrifice healthy priorities and lifestyle, which makes it harder for us to make healthy choices as individuals. 

I felt the pressure to succeed since before I can remember. I’ve continuously been fed the idea that self-worth and quality of future are measured by academic achievement, fancy jobs, and sheer productivity. I wasn’t allowed to relax or have fun until I finished all of my homework. I felt guilty for enjoying myself when there was work I could be doing. 

I found writing particularly difficult, but no one believed me. No matter how much I cried and said I couldn’t do it, I was told that if I didn’t do all of my homework perfectly and on time, then I would never get good grades, would never get into a good college, would never get a good job, and would forever be broke and miserable.  

Because of the grueling writing assignments, the lack of support, and loneliness, I hated school. Since school was my whole life, I hated being alive. I didn’t understand that it wasn’t normal to want to die every day. I thought everyone did, that’s what it sounded like from others.   

I didn’t think I should be struggling or need help. I had a nice family, a nice house, a nice school; nothing “bad” had really happened to me. It didn’t seem like I had any valid reasons to be depressed.

Things continued to get worse throughout middle and high school, compounding with struggles I was navigating in other parts of my life. I contemplated every day if I could keep living. I wanted that happy life with a dream job, but it felt impossible for me to get there. Life was too painful and I couldn’t stand it anymore. I didn’t know if I would be strong enough to keep going. I felt like I could break at any moment and I would be gone. I questioned if it was even worth it to keep chasing my dreams. 

It was always frustrating to hear “it gets better” when I never had any proof. It wasn’t getting better. There wasn’t a clear way for it to get better. I’d never seen anyone else get better. I didn’t believe I would ever get better. 

No matter how miserable I was, maintaining good grades was still my top priority. I put everything I had into schoolwork, making myself more exhausted and depressed every day. I kept pushing to finish my homework, even though it was killing me. I knew I wasn’t ok, but I didn’t know how I could change. I was told I would get even more depressed and anxious if I got behind. There was never a good time for me to take time for myself. It got to the point where I was so depleted that I couldn’t process basic math. My future as an engineer felt completely hopeless. I finally realized that if I didn’t step back and take care of myself, then I couldn’t get good grades, get into my dream college, or do whatever comes after. That wonderful life I was working towards would never exist if I were dead.  

I left school and admitted myself to partial hospitalization. The program was a dumpster fire, but I eventually got what I needed to get better. Fast-forward a few years and I’m now going to my top choice college, on track to achieve those dreams I had always been chasing. I remember the first time I went a whole day without thinking I wanted to die. It was incredible. I enjoy my life now and genuinely like being alive. I didn’t know that was even possible. I am proud of how much I have overcome and am stronger than I ever thought I could be. I have so much to live for. Every day I am reminded how grateful I am to still be here. 

I don’t know just how many people here are hurting like I was, but I believe it’s a lot. I see parts of my old self in everyone around me. 

I’m concerned about how normal it is to be miserable here. I’m disappointed by how often I hear people talk about depression or wanting to kill themselves like it doesn’t mean anything. I hear it at dinner, office hours, or just walking through the halls. This environment makes it feel like severe mental illness and suicidal ideation is not the serious problem that it is. It sends the message that it doesn’t matter if someone is really struggling. It makes it hard to tell when people are in immediate danger when suicidal comments are so common.  

It hurts me when people say they want to kill themselves, even as a “joke”. I have flashbacks to the pain I was in during the darkest period of my life. It makes me feel alone here, or like people wouldn’t care if I hadn’t made it here. The words and questions swirl around in my head, and I get scared of going back to that dark place. It certainly does not create a space where I can learn and grow, which is what I hoped for at Olin. 

I’ve tried bringing up this pattern of students saying they want to kill themselves to StAR, but have not gotten much of a response. Many of the staff seemed more concerned about the comments being inappropriate than about student wellbeing. Some suggested I should call people out directly, which I think misses the point entirely. An unhealthy culture around mental health and suicide can’t be changed by simply avoiding certain kinds of jokes.

I wish I had specific mental health resources I would recommend at Olin, but they are really lacking currently. I’ve had a difficult time getting connected to adequate care, despite reaching out to multiple people. In my experience, most of these resources have been superficial or just crisis response with little in-between. I’ve heard promises of improvement but haven’t seen much yet. I’m hopeful new staff will build these programs effectively. 

I want to send the message that everyone here matters. You are an important, unique person that deserves care, support, and to live a full, happy, healthy life. Your wellbeing is more important than any schoolwork; it’s more important than homework assignments, deadlines, grades, credit hours, project teams, or internship applications. Take the time to enjoy yourself. No matter how big or small (or compared to what others are facing), what you’re struggling with is enough to get support. If you need help, you need it. You are enough. Life is worth living. As long as you’re alive, it can get better.  

So please, 

Admin, provide better resources.  

Students, get the support you need—you do need it.  

Everyone, let’s be better as a community. 

Love, 

Concerned Student 

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline provides 24/7, connection to free, confidential support to people anywhere in the US. 

Call or text 988 

Or chat at 988lifeline.org 

R2s are available for additional support. 

How to Help E:Bios: Cross-Registration with MassBay Community College

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It is common knowledge that Olin’s biology and chemistry offerings alone are not sufficient for most students interested in designing a useful, marketable Biomedical Engineering (E:Bio) degree. For this reason, many students who wish to become E:Bios also try to take Wellesley biology and chemistry classes; these classes are extremely valuable because they offer training which Olin simply does not provide. Brandeis is also an option, but is much farther away and harder to get to, as there is no shuttle.

These E:Bio students face a major challenge: Wellesley science classes fill up very quickly, and the professors are often unable to offer additional slots for cross-registering students. Due to this scarcity, many E:Bio students take Olin technical classes, snap up a Wellesley science when they can, and call it a degree. It works, but barely – it’s always a scramble to find science courses which are relevant. These E:Bio students just don’t have access to the biology or chemistry courses they need. 

For this problem, I propose a solution: Cross-registration with MassBay Community College (MassBay). I have taken multiple classes there, and believe that it could help with this fundamental problem of E:Bios having trouble taking biology or chemistry. 

MassBay has the full traditional chemistry sequence for health professions (General Chemistry 1 & 2, Organic Chemistry 1 & 2, and Biochemistry), and also offers biology classes (Biology 1 & 2, Anatomy and Physiology, various Biotechnology offerings, etc.). An Olin student interested in E:Bio could take introductory science classes at MassBay and then go to advanced 200 or 300-level Wellesley science courses later; these more advanced courses at Wellesley tend to have more open spots. 

Massbay is not a nationally renowned institution like Wellesley, but it still provides an effective education. The class sizes are small (10-30 students), and the professors are there to teach, not do research or anything else. I have taken Chemistry 1 and 2, along with Organic Chemistry 1, at Massbay and have felt that I have gained a level of training which transfers well over to my Wellesley Organic Chemistry 2 class. 

As an institution which caters to both traditional students and working professionals, MassBay offers classes in a range of times which open up opportunities for many students. They have night classes, summer classes, and others, meaning that Olin students who often struggle with fitting Wellesley courses into their schedules may have more flexibility with MassBay ones. 

While there are clear benefits that cross-registration with MassBay could have for Olin E:Bio students, such a partnership could also have benefits for students beyond E:Bios. (Two of Massbay’s offerings which I noted as personally interesting were their EMT course and their car mechanic training progression: if you understand how to fix something, you will have better knowledge of how to design it in the future.) This cross-registration would also have distinct benefits for Massbay students. 

First off, Olin’s unique application-based classes (SoftDes, Collaborative Design, Mech Proto, Comp Arch, Fun Robo, etc.) could offer an opportunity to these students to take courses beyond the scope of their MassBay curriculum.

Additionally, the unusual contexts of both institutions could be expanded to enable Massbay students to transfer to Olin without starting again in freshman year. Transfer students are required to start again in freshman year because Olin’s educational system is too distinct from traditional institutions for someone to just jump in midway. However, a MassBay student who has taken a good number of Olin classes might be able to transfer into second or third year right out of the gate. Olin typically loses a student or two in freshman year (99% retention rate still means one person leaves!), so this transfer student could take their place. 

Here are my thoughts around how a cross-registration agreement with MassBay could be reasonably arranged: 

Olin students would be allowed to take MassBay courses after the completion of their first year at Olin. Similarly, MassBay pre-engineering and pre-biology/chemistry/biotechnology students would be allowed to take Olin classes in their second year of enrollment as an upper-level elective. This way, both MassBay and Olin students would be incentivized to explore the offerings of their own institutions before branching out. 

Oliner credit distribution for courses taken at MassBay would be decided exactly the same as it is for other cross-registered courses. Olin classes taken by MassBay students would count for engineering or science elective credit. 

Olin students would have to arrange their own transportation to MassBay, and vice versa. This would be considerably simpler than with Brandeis—MassBay already supports its students in getting to the institution through Ubers and a shuttle, and it is also a reasonable-ish (20-30 minute) bike ride away. 

Olin would follow a compensation agreement for coursework similar to that which it has with the other members of the BBOW group.

I believe that an arrangement following these guidelines could absolutely be actionable and would enable students from both institutions to reap benefits. 

This article is something I’ve been mulling over for a few weeks, and I’d love to hear your opinions on it. If you have any thoughts about this idea, please feel free to find me around campus (I’m Sammy Socol; you can look me up in the student directory) or email me at ssocol@olin.edu.

*Two of Massbay’s offerings which I noted as personally interesting were their EMT course and their car mechanic training progression: if you understand how to fix something, you will have better knowledge of how to design it in the future. 

The Black Experience At Olin: One Year Review

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Last February I made the difficult choice to share my pain and struggle with the Olin community through a Frankly Speaking article. While many people have seen the pain I’ve gone through for my writing, I am proud of my choice and proud that I continue to write and call attention to disgraceful behavior at my school.

After my first article, I was connected with other black Oliners who finally felt seen after all their time here. I have received emails from alumni thanking me for highlighting the racist shit they went through that no one would talk about. But there have been downsides—it is almost impossible for me to find people to team with me (‘cause who wants to work with the radical black girl?) Clubs at Olin now feel they can use me as their token black activist to “fix” their racism for them. 

Yet I still write, and I will continue writing this column until I graduate or Olin truly improves. Why do I do this despite the intense harm it does to my mental health and student career? 

Because I care about Olin.

This same thing happened in high school, but I never said anything because I saw that place as a stepping stone to greater things. I never said anything at past camps or jobs because those were temporary, and I didn’t like them that much anyway.

I love Olin. I love the professors who enjoy teaching and put so much care and effort into ensuring their students truly learn. I love the students who are endless bundles of intelligence, ingenuity, and creativity that give me hope for the future. I love the staff, from the shop assistants who never get mad at me for repeatedly needing help turning on machines, to the dining hall staff who smile at every student they see. I love the beautiful library where I always feel a sense of belonging due in large part to our kind and hardworking librarians. I love the project teams and the clubs and more. 

Because I love Olin, I will not allow it to be tarnished with prejudice and hate; for racist behaviors to fall through the cracks until they become truly engraved in the beliefs of this community. Olin was founded on the idea of “engineering for everyone,” and while we struggle to properly practice our promise, we can make sure that engineers with dark skin are included as respected and protected members of that “everyone.” So Oliners, you can avoid, hate me, call me hysterical, or choose to not believe me, but I am going to keep sharing stories, keep highlighting facts, and work to make Olin a better environment for all black people here, because I care. 

So, I Transferred to UMass

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In fall 2021, I entered Olin College of Engineering as a member of the class of 2025. I studied there for six semesters, and was miserable for all of them. However, this article is not a rant about why Olin was a poor fit for me and why I left; that would be irrelevant and unhealthy for me to recount. No, it’s about my experiences transferring out of it. Many people I talked to while attending (both inside and outside of Olin) believed it wouldn’t be worth leaving because Olin’s unconventional curriculum wouldn’t transfer well, and college credits don’t come without a large financial and time investment. My response: look up “sunk cost fallacy”.

There are plenty of valid academic and non-academic reasons to transfer colleges. This is also not about that; you know you best. If you want to transfer, you are valid :)

I originally wrote this article back in May, working minimum wage during a gap year. I now attend UMass Amherst, survived midterms, am out of the closet (at UMass, family pending), have a great group of friends, and am probably happier than I have ever been since I can remember.

That’s what this article is for, to let people know it is possible. If this article was published during my first or second year at Olin, I would have started the transfer application process immediately.

Transfer Credit

You will lose some time, but nowhere near as much as I originally thought.

I mainly applied to engineering programs in Massachusetts, and can only share the experience about the schools that accepted me. You receive a credit evaluation after acceptance; most schools send an evaluation in a timely fashion, other schools are Northeastern University…

Some things to keep in mind about transfer credits:

  • Some schools have a minimum credit requirement to accept a course: “Insufficient credit earned, must be 3 credits or more”. This is a problem since many Olin courses show up as two two-credit courses on your transcript.
  • Some schools accept the majority of your courses, but don’t map them to specific major requirements. You will have to put in time with your advisor, and some schools make it easier than others; unfortunately, meeting with an advisor is often behind your deposit. At larger schools, credits may have to be evaluated by different departments, which becomes a pain.
  • Download all of your syllabi from Canvas; they will ask for them. If you take a gap year like I did, your olin.edu email will be disabled, and anything behind Microsoft Single Sign On will lock you out. Then you end up awkwardly emailing all your professors and learning that external emails find their way to their junk boxes… shout out to Brad, Carrie, and Steve for responding and making me aware of this issue. You can also ask students you took classes with for the syllabus, which was extremely helpful.

Don’t forget about college credits from high school: Community College, AP exams, programs like PLTW, etc.

One reason I transferred was to have a wider selection of general education and humanities courses. You want to cherish your general education courses, not waste them on two semesters of college writing. If you don’t have AP, look up CLEP College Composition; this can free up time for more interesting general education, or for electives that might interest you.

UMass Specifically

A major reason I chose UMass was due to how accommodating they have been in supporting transfer students. The Electrical and Computer Engineering department has been especially supportive in this regard, and has been willing to hear me out on all my Olin courses for credit mappings. They have several programs and housing options specific to transfer students, and have ultimately made the experience pleasant. Not every department is like this—more on that later.

My advisor here initially gave me an estimate of 1.5 years, the same amount of time I had left at Olin. I opted for 2 years at UMass since I prefer to keep the credit load lighter and touch grass.

You will need to advocate for yourself, even in a supportive department. I am not good at that. I did end up taking an engineering math course that covers similar content to QEA3 and ESA. Perhaps I could have talked my way into getting credit for that.

You will end up with some goofy-looking schedules transferring from Olin. Next semester, I have Junior Design Project, a statistics course meant for sophomores, a graduate-level operating system course, an undetermined general education course, and possibly freshman physics. I still have no idea if I have credit for Physics 1&2 or not (they have the syllabi for QEA1-3, ModSim, and ISIM). The Physics department has not been easy to work with on this, unlike the college of engineering.

I don’t want to talk too much about money in this article. TLDR: most private institutions will cost more than Olin (assuming the 50% scholarship is still a thing). However, I am now an in-state student at a public university, so it is a lot more affordable in the end (even considering the extra time I am taking).

I would have preferred an urban campus, but I love everything else about UMass so far. You have to make compromises in life.

So you want to transfer

Okay so you’re considering transferring. Here’s some advice that you can’t just google.

  • Many schools (particularly private institutions) look for 1-2 years of college, and will openly say they will reject transfer students with 3+ years unless they are truly exceptional. Also, if you’re unhappy, don’t wait 3 years like I did; stop sinking more time into something that isn’t working for you.
  • I already said it, but download important records that are behind Microsoft Single Sign On. Your email will be disabled if you take a gap year.
  • Olin has a letter explaining what some of their courses cover and how it maps to a more conventional curriculum. You can add it as an additional document upload in your transfer applications. This is also helpful for credit evaluations. (I still haven’t heard back from Physics yet though…)
  • Visit campuses. I applied to college during peak `rona, and online “tours” really did not influence my top choices. It actually helps to have a sense of the neighborhood (or lack thereof), and how alive the campus feels. Admittedly, this may be irrelevant to the current generation of students who actually got to take tours.

Editors note: If you would like to get in touch with the author of this piece, please contact the Frankly Speaking team.