Horoscopes by Drunk Editors

Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22): You’ll be surprised by what you can achieve. Stay close to your friends. It is possible to get lost on campus.
Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21): Get out of your dorm room and try to find a place on campus that no one else knows exists. Be adventurous (or lie).
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21): Let me guess your Halloween costume: drunk college student at a party?
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19): Every single printer is going to run out of paper on Thursday, October 13th.
Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18): A beber y a tragar, queelmundosevaa acabar.
Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20): There are only so many days out the year when drinking a pumpkin spice latte is acceptable/ possible. Take advantage of it while you can.
Aries (March 21 – April 19): If you have 2 over- due p-sets, 6 hours of meetings, reading for that Wellesley class, and code that even the NINJAs can’t figure out, why wouldn’t you go into Boston for the weekend?
Taurus (April 20 – May 20): Oh, dear. look at the time. The little horoscope fairies have long passed out. Here, write your own: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Gemini (May 21 – June 20): Do you know all the courses you need in order to graduate? (Seniors, here’s looking at you).
Cancer (June 21 – July 22): Professors love frantic emails 5 hours before the deadline. Remember that for your next lab.
Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22):
Fall only comes once a year. For like, a quarter of the year, but you know what I mean. Take those Instagram pictures while you can, soon you’ll have more frozen water than anyone can deal with.
Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22): When homework threatens to crush your very soul, just remember that Fall TV is back, and just about everything is up-to-date on Netflix. You will get through this.

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