Misrepresentation at Olin

As the newest figurehead for the Amount of Veggie Meals is Too Damn High! party, it is my responsibility to bring to light a repressed majority: Olin students who are capable of digesting meat.

For years, this group of students has silently perched in the dark recesses of the dining hall, pacified by the vocal minority of vegans and herbavores. Toiling through suppers of fava beans and tofurky, the meat-eaters have suffered. But they will endure. We will stay strong, and pray for a day in which the words “General Tso’s” are superseded by something other than “Tofu”.

Gastronomical warriors, fearless in solitude we have lived through the night terrors, the visions, the flashbacks of quinoa and carrots. Alas, there is hope, a glimmer of light. Today I found slivers of pepperoni on pizza, a quickly forgotten foreshadowing of better times to come.